Tuesday Topics #45 - What Do You Say?
It's spring break here, and the mustard is in full force. Yesterday, I took about a million photos of Cabana for our annual mustard shot (well, maybe not a million, but at least 20), and this is the only one that turned out even halfway decent. Pathetic!
Yesterday on our walk, we met a woman walking a shih tzu-type dog. The dog was straining to meet Cabana, and the woman asked if Cabana was friendly. I said yes and we allowed the dogs to meet. The problem was, HER dog wasn't that friendly! He immediately put his front paws up on Cabana's back and got snippy and territorial of his owner. Cabana quickly moved away from the woman and the dog, and the woman said, "Oh look, they're playing." I thought, uh no, that's not playing. Obviously, this woman was completely oblivious to her dog's body language and uneducated about dog interactions. She wasn't a bad person or a bad dog owner, and her dog was probably a very nice dog--but they lacked knowledge and socialization experience. As we walked on, I chided myself for not having spoken up and for allowing her to continue thinking that her dog was "playing".
Then today, an older couple brought their black lab mix, Zena, to the park. I had met them a few times before, so I knew they had rescued their dog fairly recently, maybe 2-3 months ago. Every time Zena comes to the park, other dogs react strangely toward her. Non-aggressive dogs get a bit aggressive. Submissive dogs get overly submissive. And Cabana just avoids her like the plague. Zena tends to hackle, and I keep watching her to figure out what it is about her that makes the other dogs behave differently. Is she anxious, fearful, insecure? Probably a mixture of all those things.
Maybe because I had been silent yesterday with the shih tzu incident, today I decided to say something. Here was this nice couple who had rescued a black dog (usually the hardest dogs to adopt out), and I wanted to see them succeed and have a good experience. So I just asked the couple if they had ever worked with a trainer and that maybe they might want to, since Zena seemed to be sending some unusual vibes. The man answered by saying that he didn't know about working with a trainer, but that one thing he did know is that Zena loves to play with Bella, a young Golden Retriever at the park. Moments before, I had witnessed Zena completely overpowering and pinning Bella, who is just about as submissive as a dog can get. I explained that, ideally, you want to see both dogs taking turns being on top and playing equally, rather than one always getting the upper hand while the other one keeps trying to get away.
But now, I feel like I should have kept my mouth shut, and I'm chiding myself for being a know-it-all!
We all have times when we see other dog owners doing things that we don't agree with. Sometimes, it's just that they don't know better, but sometimes, they think what they're doing is right. Of course, we don't want to finger wag or get obnoxious, but sometimes, a well-meaning and appropriately stated comment can be helpful. I'm not sure if that couple found my little comments helpful; they probably just thought, who asked for your opinion?!
Do you ever tell other dog owners what you think? Is there a way to provide unsolicited advice in a manner that will be well-received and make a difference? Or is it really none of our business and we should just keep it to ourselves?
